OKay, here's the lowdown.

I am in a bitchy mood. I am in a bitchy PLACE in my life. I have good things and I have bad things, and mostly, things are semi-normal, but I am not, in particular, feeling particularly patient or friendly. I am feeling moody and short and like I would prefer to be left alone.

Why?

Well, Mars is in Aquarius, if that means anything to ya. If it doesn't, then I'll give you that last week I spent 4 days in bed because I was fighting off the flu. I wasn't sick in the URI sense, but I had bone-crushing fatigue and muscle aches. Then my PMS began, and I don't know if it's because of that or the flu, or the combo, but I have had the worst night-sweats.... I wake up wet and hot and gross and feel like I haven't slept at all. It's disgusting.
And new to this particular PMS cycle, I seem to have inherited Sassy's PMS "Don't Touch Me!" Phobia ( she just cannot STAND it when her hormones are raging). Mine is slightly different, as it looks like "Everything Itches and Don't Even LOOK At Me, Oh My GOD, Shut Up, Shut Up, Shut UPPPPPP!!!!"

I'm not saying that gives me a license to be mean, or rude, or anything like that. I'm just saying this:
If I have been mean or rude or short with you, I sincerely apologize.
If you leave me alone for another week or so I would likely be more fit company for man or beast.
Right now, I would choose a glass of cold orange juice and a rerun of "America's Next Top Model" over any of my loved ones, friends or family. Unfortunately this includes any incidents that might require me to be of service, even those in which you are bleeding out the side of your head. I am feeling THAT mean and crappy.
Knowing all this, PLEASE do not take it personally if I am rude, mean, or short. I promise to make it up to you later.
I really, really do.
I will call you all back and suchlike then. I promise. I do love you, I do.
I really, really will, and I really, really do.
Again: do NOT take it personally!

Thank you. That is all.