A few random things from the last few days:

• I was driving down the street to go pay my power bill, absent-mindedly checking out people's Xmas decorations in yards around the neighborhood. I had to go around the block out of my way because I thought I saw, standing in someone's yard chatting the resident up, that Bob The Drug and Alcohol Counselor from "Celebrity Rehab". ( Yesh, I watch "Celebrity Rehab." Partly because I love me some Dr. Drew-- he really is a cool, hot guy, but he's also a really smart physician-- but also, as a recovering alcoholic, I always learn new things about addiction. Plus, I like to be an armchair Case Supervisor: "You seriously aren't letting Sean Stewart out on a Day Pass! What, are you STUPID? He's so gonna go score.") I LOVE that Bob guy. He's this total case for Hope ( he'd been to rehab 15x before he cleaned his ass up. And now he's a CDAC, which is really noble of him to do) and no one pulls any bullshit over on him. Anyway, I got all excited because I wanted to go shake his hand and say, "Dude, thanks for sharing your story, because it's really inspiring, and I always learn something new when you talk."

But it wasn't him. Alas. It got me thinking, though, which is that I might want to go back to meetings myself. I've been sober for so long I forget I fall and lapse even if I don't use. Like this Heroin Boy thing this summer.....well, he got that name in jest and in a flattering, gosh-he-smells-like-a-present-made-just-for-me! way, but as I mentioned to someone recently, while he's also crave-inducing, he's totally bad for me. And I saw myself doing all manner of addict-y -like things while in the throes of that infatuation. Like cyberstalking. Like trying to manipulate outcomes. Like gossiping and not being who I am. I didn't like the way it made me feel about myself in the end, although it was certainly a rush in the moment. It's a tip-off to me that I kinda need to work on some stuff that AA might readily address, like, oh, you know. Faith. Letting Go. Hope. All the stuff I like to pretend I have a grip on but are really only tenuous to me when I need them the most.

• I think we ( we as in me and Angel) are adopting a friend. There's two girl kittens available- all shots, totally fixed, for free. I have been wanting to get A a friend forever, since he's lonely, but I haven't been able to afford the fees. But I was at this yard sale, and the woman mentioned her neighbor had some kitties she needed to adopt out....so, I went to meet them. I can't have both, only one. I don't know which I'll choose. But stay tuned...

• Some snapshots of Really Special People Coming Into Work:

1.) "I need this book? It's called (looks at Post-It)...um, "Grapes and Rats" ( Me: Er...do you mean "The Grapes of Wrath"? ) "I don't know." ( You know what? I think that's probably what it is. Here. ( handing her the book). Have fun.)

2.) "Do you have movies? You know. MOVIES. On DVD. I mean, a DVD section????" ( frantic, and talking to me like I'm an idiot. Me: No, I'm sorry, only X and Y Stores carry DVDs.) "Well. I.. **sighing**.. oh. Oh no. Oh, ** sighing**". ( At points like these, which come more often than ever these days, I sometimes think, 'Is my role here to carry the guilt for not having what she wants? Am I to be a witness to her angst so someone will acknowledge it? Because really, I can't actually DO anything about this, so therefore, I am flummoxed. And yet, oddly, coldly uncaring.')

3.) "Do you have "Twilight"? ( Me: Right behind you, on that table. Lots of 'em.) " Oh, okay. Wait. Do you have "New Moon"/"Eclipse"/"Breaking Dawn"? ( Me : On that table. Lots of 'em.) "Oh." ( A pause.) "Do you have them in hardcover/softcover/a size for my dog to read/cheaper/fancier/in a box set?" ( Me: Well, let's see: yes/ yes on two of them/ no, not ever/only the first one/again, only the first one/yes, but not in stock. THEY'RE ALL ON THE TABLE BEHIND YOU.) "Oh". ( A pause). "How much are they? " ( Me: ::slams forehead into the counter and begins to weep.::)

People are so fucking special. And by "special", I mean "retarded". I cannot fathom for the life of me how folks like these -- of which this is just a small slice!-- manage to get out of bed and put clothes on and function. I wonder if LA County should order a plethora of short yellow buses to shuttle them around just so they don't hurt themselves or others.

• I'm trying to pick a film to see on Christmas Day. That's my tradition. I loathe the holiday, and even if I'm in a reasonable proximity to family, I nip out of the insanity and go to the movies. It makes me feel like I'm getting away with something, in a weird way, and it's much more satisfying for me to be in a theatre getting to watch something I've not had time to see than sitting around pretending to fawn over some present/baby/televised special. I've found that it's best to go to indie theaters on that day, since they're mostly empty and it is such a sweet experience to be one of six people in there quietly munching on popcorn, versus the mad crush at any googleplex in town. Last year I saw "Persepolis" and I was there in Beverly Hills, having gotten there with so little traffic it was almost enjoyable driving down Sunset ( !?!?!), and the film was tremendously moving. And about a week later, it disappeared from distribution and I was so glad I caught it.

This year, I'm thinking of "Doubt", with Meryl Streep/Phillip Seymour Hoffman or "Slumdog Millionaire" by Danny Boyle ( of "Trainspotting" et al, fame). I thought about "Australia", because I love me some Baz Lurhman and Hugh Jackman, but the 3 hour running time and the Nicole Kidman factor have me dithering. It's also not a small film, and likely to be out in wide release. I'm taking suggestions....but as I look, I don't see much. Have I missed something, or are indie films lacking anything of interest this year? Hard to tell.

That's all for now. Stay tuned for further updates...over and out.