Not In Kansas Anymore...

Click your heels, and see if home is where you hang your hat, or somewhere else inside yourself as this simple, postmodern girl takes on L.A.

Monday, August 03, 2009

So this is what frustrates me about looking for jobs: people have listings like this:

We are in search for Highly Trained & motivated agents to show our Featured Listings.
Must Have:

-Great internet skills
-organized & experienced in office administrator
-Bilingual in always a plus
-Must have experience or Knowledge in Property management or Real estate industry -Microsoft Word , Excel skills -Multitasking skills
-Common Sense
-Great salesmanship
-Team Players
-Great cordination skills
-Outside the box thinkers
-Creativity Welcome
-Great Marketing Skills
-Honesty , reliablity , dedication , motivation
-Serious people only

"Only serious People!! we do not like to waste our time "
"We are only Looking for the very best of the best"

Available Position :
-Weekend Receptionist 9am-5pm
-Marketing Specialist

Okay, while we're at it, why not ask me to juggle and provide singing entertainment for the office? Could that list be any longer? Then there's the whole "We want Serious People!!" thing. Well, who doesn't? What are they going to say? "Please, all you losers and meth addicts, apply here!" ?

Then there are the random spelling and/or grammar mistakes, WHILE asking the potential applicant to be rivaled only by Marlo Thomas from "That Girl!". This ad ( which is real, mind you) is a relatively tame one in terms of glaring errors, but what's up with random capitalization?

And then, the coup de grace, which always kills me: the pay rate for all of these skills and the "seriousness"? They either don't mention it, OR it's at best, $9 an hour. That's right! $1 over minimum wage.

If it isn't, or offer to pay more, it's usually an ad like this:

A 17 year old International Company that is producing a billion dollars in revenue and is endorsed by Donald Trump is expanding in the Los Angeles Area. We are looking for sharp and intelligent people to form the core foundation of the organization that will be leading the expansion throughout all of Southern California.

WOW! Where can I sign up? When I do, is there a bridge you'd like to sell me as well??