Four in the morning. Am I in bed asleep? Of course not, or else I wouldn't be writing here. Why am I not asleep? Because it's hot. It's been hot for days, but now it's humid. Why? Fuck if I know. I moved 2000 miles to get away from summers like this and damned if we're in the middle of an 80% humidity heatwave.

Humidity makes me want to sleep and sleep and sleep. I always say I have a backward hibernation system, or some twisted form of SAD. I love winter, I love rain, I love all the cold weather. This kind of weather always makes me want to not leave the house, eat carbs and sleep like a bear. It always makes me grumpy and down. The September comes and cool winds blow in and I'm a normal person again. Maybe I should move to Seattle.

I need a pool. Or access to a pool. Could I get a prescription for that ? ( Note to self: ask shrink.) And a boyfriend ( who will bring me sandwiches and give me a GOOD use of sweat versus just sitting around and sweating, and sleep with me on cool sheets.). Pretty sure I can't get the latter there on prescription. Wonder how to acquire? ( Note to self: do NOT call up old boyfriends out of desperation. Besides, when did they ever bring you sandwiches?) .

Save me. Anybody.