After all my angst and worry, Mr N. narrowly escapes being booted to the sidewalk , per the "He's Just Not That Into You" standards-- or anyone with common self-esteem-- by FINALLY pulling it together enough to send me an email, at about midnight Tuesday. He basically stated that he was sorry for not emailing sooner ( can I just note here he said he'd CALL? Or is that getting too caught up in the semiotics of dating and not seeing the forest for the trees?) as he'd been "crazy busy" and enjoyed our "chat" and "was looking forward to more."

Wow, don't get TOO excited there, buddy, you might actually show your hand. Whoo, I'm swooning.

In my response, I played it cool (even though what I wanted to say was "Were you trapped under a bus?!?!?!" ): I really had a lovely time talking to you, hope your week gets better, hope to see you soon, blah blah blah.

I gotta say I am less than impressed with whole dating miasma. It's not like I'm not talking to other people, or expecting him to NOT talk to other people., or see them, etc. But I just want to yell, "HOW MUCH BETTER COULD A FIRST DATE HAVE GONE, MISTER??" I mean seriously: his email? Lackluster, generic. Nonspecific.

Or maybe I'm just being too picky. But I do think it's noncommittal, and he could call and chat and y'know, not play it so cool. I'm glad he wrote, but am finding myself highly irritated with this game. And it is a game, I'm pretty sure. For whatever reason, he wants to remain at a slight distance, and that's a little gamey. Everyone else says " Well, he IS looking for a new job, blah blah, and he might be caught up in his own shit." True, but still. I just throw up my hands and shake my head: What. The. Fuck. Ever.

Perhaps this is modern dating, something I am admittedly antagonistic toward anyway. Perhaps this is nothing . Perhaps his attitude will improve next time. I like him enough that I'll give it a next time. But let me be clear: I do have other ( very interesting, now, unlike before) people interested, and while he's by far the most appealing candidate, I don't need to hang around and wait for him to cozy up to actually DATING me properly ( you know: calling, talking, making plans to meet?). It surprises me, quite honestly, that he isn't trying to already. That's not the person I met. Or my experience of the situation.

So I don't know where he's at about all this, but part of me hopes the shit better be hitting the fan on his end with a good excuse if this level of "interaction" is on the continuing horizon. Or I'll just up and forget it.

*Sigh* As if any of that were so easy. But a girl's gotta have standards, ya know? To set the tone of things, and so forth? And wanting someone who's really into her, and not putting up with gamey shit for too long? Right. It's just upholding them that's the bitch. Isn't that always the way? *Sigh*.

I don't really get any of this dating crap or understand how it leads to anything of merit or measure, so I'll admit to being possibly wrong, and too too, or having too high of standards or expecting too much, or whatever. I just think it should be more, more....I don't know. Openly enthusiastic? Engaged? More wooing and old-fashioned, I guess. Antiquated notions, I'm sure.
Dammit, where is Cary Grant when you need him?

*Sigh* ( Been doing alot of that lately, can you tell?) I wish I had a better idea of what The Rules are ( and no, not from that stupid book) and how to read signals better. Or perhaps I'm better off not overanalyzing it in the first place, and taking it all at face value. Who knows? Who can tell?? You've only got your gut in the end, and mine is saying, "That's it?!?!" Like it or not, right or not.
Maybe I'll have a more reasonable take on it in a few days, but now...that's where I am. Suck ass.

I suppose it could be worse. God knows that's true....

John Cusack needs to just show up and save me from the nonsense and misery. Now. Where are you when I need you, John??

*Sigh* Man, this dating thing blows. *Sighing perpetually".....